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Post Info TOPIC: Tried to lurk the Zoom Web Crawlers live broadcast last night!


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RE: Tried to lurk the Zoom Web Crawlers live broadcast last night!


I'm prepared to sink to the bottom of the internet gutter with these women...

drangervibes.jpg

 

Clearly I am attracted to the most classy women on the internet...

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Life was so simple when I just ignored them... I played a little stock market, fixed some cars, got a little fatter and even had the shank of most evenings to enjoy watching my 50 year old movie collection from the 1980's... 

And now I have once again fed the trolls... they will say "Oh I knew he couldn't quit us"... fucking more addictive than the stock market and casino combined! 

What does it say about me that I find this kind of stuff to be entertaining? 



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And let's not forget about our grudge-muffin... Desi!

You know, our MacArther Park hero who takes photos of her noble efforts to feed the poor and follows them up with photos of her eating at some fancy resturant. LOL, taking the good with the bad!

I'm telling you, this woman really is the most dangerous of the bunch...

 

desicruze.jpg

I mean at this very moment she's probably thinking of how to do it... perhaps even making a voodoo doll of sorts! My only worry is that she might read this and decide, "Well maybe it might just be easier and more fun to destroy SELLC's life."

I am going to carry a Little Debbie cream-pie around in case she tries to ambush me... I'll un-wrap the cookie and toss it to make my escape!

And maybe she's right...

Desican.jpg

That's a bold statement coming from her! Does she think she's the only kid who has ever been pissed on at a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert?

And her Friend Rachel is pretty sketchy too... I'd for sure be doing myself a favor quitting this Motley Crue!

What's $20 amongst friends? Another three or four pounds of ham for your people?

girl_ybaws.jpg

But this is what I get for being a nice guy... trying to keep a civil tongue up her ass is not easy. 



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Desi and Rachel from the Hollywood Crime Scene Pod bought me a nice steak dinner this fine Memorial Day morning!

100smackers.jpg

OH THE HUMANITY!

Step aside Ted Cruz! I'm gonna take it right into the danger zone!

 



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So I ended up settling for a Detroit Style Deep Dish pizza from Little Casears and pocketed the remaining $80 from Rachel and Desi... It's not entirely clear why our money is no good with them. I can only assume it's because they don't want to feel like they're poaching from the Web Crawlers? Whatever the reason, it was a most delicious pizza! Even splurged on the extra chesse and pepperoni! Spared no expense! Even got bread sticks with TWO sides of butter garlic dipping sauce (They used to be .50 but now cost $1.20 each!) I sure hope them middle-aged ladies over there at HCS have a sense of humor... It's all in good fun, even if I am a little rough with Desi, she can handle it... after all, she is a big Johnny Depp fan!

Speaking of Johnny Depp, it would seem like Ali is jumping on the bandwagon now too! 

goplove.jpg

 And look at Prego Melissa, just egg'n her on! And that xoxo at the end? That's mine! LOL

The recent Depp / Heard verdict has them conflicted... on one hand they secretly LOVE Johnny Depp, but on the other hand they can't admit it publicly due to their politics... explains a lot.

But no worries! They can always remember this as the day they ALMOST destroyed Johnny Depp's life

And I'm still in shock that Eden did an advertisement for a clit vibrator! She's always advocating for insurance companies to cover her luxury bones in one way or another! Her boyfriend must feel such shame right now, knowing he isn't exactly ringing her bell! lol

Of all the women, I would have never thought it would be Eden... although I should have known, after that dancing cactus. 

I guess as time goes by, more and more of our beloved internet ladies will get knocked up... except Eden, her boyfriend clearly isn't getting the job done!

 



-- Edited by SELLC on Thursday 2nd of June 2022 03:55:06 AM

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Well today was the last day of my youngest Son's Senior year in High School! WOOT-WOOT!

skylerallen2022.jpg

Skyler Allen - Class of 2022

I know that I don't share much personal information in the public threads, and especially this thread... but it just seems to dove into the whole "Watching someone grow up" theme that I think this thread represents deep down at it's core, underneath all the jokes and teasing that has gone on in the past four pages. None the less it's for sure an exciting and nostalgic time for the entire family as our youngest child has graduated High School and is officially an Adult! And I use that term loosely, much like I do for the rest of the 12 ladies in this thread... except for Brandee, she's even older than I am! Skyler is perhaps why I follow so many liberal women... for he has always embodied that Liberal doctrine and I could never figure out how that came to be! For example, just a few weeks back he got his 4th and hopefully final COVID shot/booster... two days later he tested positive for COVID! And I just have to look at him and wonder, "Where the FUCK is this coming from!?"... Doesn't change the fact that I'm really proud of him, and it's going to hurt when he moves out like his older brother did last year... but such is the way... I have also recently found out that my oldest is moving to Texas in August with his long time friends who are going to college at Texas A&M! My oldest, Rex Brandon (20 y/o) and his buddies are some of the most conservative kids you'll meet! And yet knowing that he is moving away to live his best life still makes me wonder "Where the FUCK is this coming from!?" are we really that bad as parents? I try to think back to when I was their age and realize that this is just what your kids do... they grow up and then they live their lives... but what about us parents? 

That is why it's really fun to follow people and watch them grow up... For the past 21 years Brandee and I have pretty much made our kids the center of our entire universe! Sure at times we have had our moments, but the plan was ALWAYS to spend as much time with our kids as humanly possible! And I'm glad we did because sitting here now talking about it, just feels like 21 years has slipped away in the blink of an eye... It begs the question, "What the fuck are we going to do now?" 

Following some of these ladies, and watching the Web Crawlers Pod's where Ali and Melissa actually think they can have "lives" after children is really quite funny! LOL, and I REALLY look forward to seeing how it all plays out! I'm pretty good at reading between the lines and to me this reminds me a lot of how Nikki Hilton (now Rothschild) told Paris Hilton that she is in for a "rude awakening" when it comes to kids and REAL family life... We're talking REAL family life here, not any of that fake shit you'll see on Keeping up with the Kardashians or 90 day fiancee, or even the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (or whatever it's called)...

So I guess in many ways, my recent teasing of Melissa, Eden and Desi may have been manifested in insecurities that I have going on in my life right now... and that while I adore them all, I still can't help but sit here and lick my wonunds... What the hell are we going to do when all the kids move out and we have nobody but ourselves to worry about? Because you see, it's much easier to worry about other people than it is to worry about yourself. I think that the people who say "You have to help yourself before you can help anyone else" either didn't have kids, or raised kids that turned out to be psychopaths. That may very well be the "rude awakening" that is known as parenthood. 

It will be a fun journey none the less... who knows what the future holds at this point... I never thought I grow to be this old (47) but here I am, killing it! LOL

So you'll have to excuse me now as I wander over to Facebook and do the whole "First Days / Final Days of school" post... seems everyone is doing it! Well, at least us parents who have been rudely awakened to the fact that parenting is a gift.



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Look out world! The Class of 2022 is coming thru!



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And I haven't really weighed in with the whole Johnny Depp / Amber Heard trial outside of a few memes... So here it is, they both got out of hand! They loved hard with passion and burnt the candle at both ends... So Johnny won this one, but this is just scene three and I hardly think we have Heard the last of Amber... She'll be back! It basically boiled down to a popularity contest and Johnny was just more popular! But Amber is now more well-known and popular than ever before, even if it is for shitting in Johnny's bed. 

With that said, let the memes roll!

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-- Edited by SELLC on Friday 3rd of June 2022 10:24:26 PM

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Wow! And they weren't even married!

Indiana woman allegedly tracks boyfriend with AirTags, kills him after spotting him with another woman

Gaylyn Morris, 26, was arrested early Friday after reportedly following Andre Smith to Tillys Pub in Indianapolis by using an Apple AirTag and GPS.  

Morris told a witness that she was Smiths girlfriend and that he was cheating on her, according to investigators. Morris told the witness she was going to use an empty wine bottle to beat up the other woman. 

The confrontation escalated when Morris swung the bottle at the woman, but the attack was intercepted by Smith, according to an affidavit. 

Employees of the bar then asked the trio to leave the establishment, the Indy Star reported. A witness recounted thats when Morris allegedly attacked Smith with her car

Morris "pulled forward and clipped the victim (Smith), and he went down, at which time... (Morris) then backed over him and then pulled forward and hit him for the third time," the probable cause affidavit stated. 

https://www.foxnews.com/us/woman-tracks-boyfriend-airtags-kills

doh

 

 

Talk about messing with the wrong woman! Guess the guy had "Big Dick Energy"



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She was mad.

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I been trying to wean myself off Melissa the past week... it was working until she dropped this super-feral-hot-ass photo

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Fucking six months prego and she's still got it! OMG! (bites lip) MERCY!

#NOFILTER!

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Filter.

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So it was Fathers day... 1st one since all the kids have turned 18 and graduated High School... as they drift in their own direction I have declared that I am now a "retired" father... LOL

I say this because I don't want to become one of them fathers who feels like my kids owe me some special treatment every Fathers Day for the rest of their life... And trust me when I say, the pleasure was all mine! lol

fathersday.jpg

So I'm retired... figure it's for the best, might as well before I become a grandpa... which could happen, but even then grand parenting is a part time gig... I say this with an air of ignornce since I don't have any grandkids...

I won't say nothing about my Dad, but if I had to pick a clip...

He is no Gary, that's for sure! And with as angry as he is all the time, I'm pretty sure he would indeed crawl out of the grave looking for his Father's Day cake! 

But I don't want to come off like I have Daddy issues, like our friend Desi... Lord knows she does good work for the homeless people, and thanks to us; at least now after her charity work, she post her celebratory treat dinners on her friend Rachel's Insta... lol 

Still, she's a tough old bird... prolly rich AF too. 

No doubt Jim Beam Bourbon will wake up the dead... Perhaps I need a drink? A celebratory drink of sorts... 

cuporexy.jpg



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Me, at Fathers Day Dinner with my dear 'ole Dad,

whoremomma.jpg

Only he ain't single...



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Looks like I picked a bad week to quit drinking...

On the bright side, since I was awake when it started pouring down rain with no notice, I was able to pull my convertible in the garage before it got soaked! 

So I got that going for me tonight!



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I totally didn't just melt down in this thread...

I was just suggesting 80's films for Ali!

alioop.jpg

No doubt, Ali has a history of picking the worst men... LOL



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Feel like I was in detention for two years with these people during COVID...

2020-2022



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I got my Fathers Day Cake!

cp22.jpg

 

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Flipping Dippin Dots! LOL, I didn't try any... I stuck with the free lemonade!

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VERY GOOD RIDE!

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ALSO VERY GOOD!

 

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I managed to get a hotel room when they were booked. AND, I didn't get robbed by any hookers of $1500 cash! Not sure if it's because I avoided over friendly women (that one local blond buying a pint of Wild Turkey in the liquor store was too friendly) or because I didn't use the room safe. confuse

Maybe it was because I only brought a G this time... or maybe it's because I didn't go to Miami? Whatever the case, my feet are KILLING ME!

https://autotrend.activeboard.com/t65563501/my-recent-visit-to-miami/

cp22c.jpg

Extra crispy!



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I guess I must have pissed off Ali when I said she had bad taste in men... because she recently made her Twitter private!

I mean, "traditionally" she has had bad taste in men... I don't know about this new guy, he seems like a cool guy, but time will tell... 

I'm telling you, people on the West Cost and down in Florida don't know what they're missing at Cedar Point! People always going on and on about Disney, but clearly these people have never been to Cedar Point!

One recommendation I would make if you're going to visit Cedar Point in Sandusky Ohio - MAKE SURE YOU GET A ROOM AT THE PARK! You get in earlier, and life is just better! I never knew how convenient  they were until a family member got us one... as a kid I once even stayed in the RV section of the park too! Back in the old days (pre-RV and in my teens with friends) we used to drive there in the morning, ride all day and drive home at night. This trip has made me face the fact that I am getting old, as the Magnum kicked my ass (last few hills have the kick of a magnum with the speed you're going) and the Raptor almost made me feel a little nauseous, although I had just drank three lemonades (free) before getting on the ride. LOL, point is, as a kid I had more energy! I didn't even get to visit the prospector themed part of the park! This is the old school part that is a nostalgic nod to the old days of the 1800's and early 1900's... Not because I didn't have time, but because my dogs gave out! I crammed a lot into 24 hours! I spent most of my time hitting all the new rides that came out over the past 10 years that I have been away. There is just that much to do! And even if rollercoasters aren't your thing, you can feed the carp, ride the train and enjoy one of the best amusment parks in the entire country, if not the WORLD!

There is just so much history at Cedar Point, a proud history! From the classic wooden coasters, the carnival classics and even the modern day marvels! Cedar Point is America's Rollercoast! I cannot stress enough how EVERYONE should experience it. 



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Prolly didn't get robbed cause you didn't use the safe. I don't trust "public safes"

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Although I must admit Shawnee... I probably should have invested in a fedora or even some sunscreen during my little trip...

My forhead is peeling and I'm starting to feel like Goldmember

The woman says it makes me look like I'm a Klingon from Star Trek... I thought it was a great look, but damn! It's peeling! 



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I get lots of sun. Especially mowing. I hear ya on the peeling.

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This kind of thing is not going to get you invited to Christmas dinner, Eden!

fuaeden.jpg

Eden should like this tune, she's kinda grunge... after all she writes a little for Mike Judge's Beavis and Butt Head films, or should I say cartoons?  



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I'm howling! 

ambulancechasers.jpg

https://www.crowdjustice.com/case/justice-4-cyberstalking-victim/

 

If any of the wonderful women in this thread EVER feel like they no longer want to be a part of all this fun, they can email me at mercedesbenz@126world.com, and I will erase any and all public mention of them here on this forum!

And if you ever think that I am anything but your BIGGEST FAN on the internet, who would stick by you thru thick and thin, then just let me know! 

With that said and out of the way, it sure seems like them attorneys over there in the UK are more vicious than the Ambulance Chasers we have here in the USA! Setting up crowd-funded legal defense accounts for people to donate? LOL, it just seems to escape everyones mind that these attorneys should be seeking donations AFTER they have proven their case, otherwise I'd say the law firms and attorneys setting them up should be held liable in the event their clients lose! If they feel so strongly they should take the case on contingency! They must not have any ethics laws over there in the UK... heck, I think the people in the courts still wear them wigs and tight flood pants!

No but seriously, I pay close attention to the people around me because if I didn't like them, they wouldn't be around me! I appoligize if I have bad taste in women, I have tried to find new friends on the internet but none of them entertain me quite as well... With the exception of the members of this forum, who choose to be here, I don't really have many friends outside of family... at least not online... and for sure not people who I would spend the time to write about. When it comes to being famous you need all the help you can get! I'm doing all that I can, and let's be honest, nobody takes notice of people unless they do or say something funny or stupid! I get it, and it's got me HOWLING most of the times when I have a free moment to catch up with total strangers, whom I consider my most closest internet peeps!

I should also add that I have NEVER 

- Called on the phone, or even texted ANYONE from here except for social media DM and (except Brandee)

- Met IRL or even visited ANY REMOTE area in proximity to them (except Brandee)

- I have never EVER even seen in the flesh any of these internet personalities (except Brandee)

 

What I have done is-

- Shower them with attention and love (Brandee included)

- Given most, but not all of them donations aka CASH (Brandee included and currently the record holder in this department lol)

- Been mind fucked on many occasion by almost every single one (Brandee included)

 

** We now return you to our normally scheduled broadcast. **



-- Edited by SELLC on Friday 8th of July 2022 07:46:49 PM

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Looks like Desi is getting plowed on the pier again this year...

plowedonthepier.jpg

She want's some of the lion.



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Welp, in unrelated news about me... I recently canceld my week long vacation at the lake that would have ended tomorrow afternoon. I did it because I had my fun at Cedar Point, and after EVERYONE in the family dissing me - leaving me there and not even bothering to come out, I decided screw all the work that was needed to execute a week long get away and just buy myself a Mustang! Now my youngest has flown the coupe, after getting his graduation money of course, and my oldest is moving to Texas in three weeks. 

I don't want to seem like a kill-joy... but things are pretty fucked up over here at the moment... and I mean that like this pandemic has seriously screwed things up! People aren't even making sense anymore, and honestly I feel like I'm living in a trailer of common sense while I stare out the window at a tornado of stupidity! 

And I won't even mention the fact that I been training my kid to fix cars since he could walk, he even got certified as a specialty mechanic soon as he turned 18! But now it seems, he'd rather mow lawns with his buddy with the last three weeks! WTF!? Offered to pay off his debts, give him $1000 cash up front to start a "real" working agreement for a solid week of work! Even offered to set him up his own company so he could enjoy tax perks that he would otherwise miss out on and still feel independent, but he turned his nose up at ALL of it! There is just no pleasing these kids anymore! 

What it feels like trying to get someone to work now days...

There is really sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much more I'd like to bitch about too! Like waking up today after taking an elderly person to have their eyes worked on this morning, to my Mustang, with a tarp over it, filled up like a swimming pool... So I asked Brandee, why didn't you pull it in the garage? She said, "I can't drive a stick and I don't know how to put the top up in the Corvette"... And I'm just like... WOMAN! You owned a stickshift truck when I met you! HAVE YOU GONE SOFT ON ME?

So my kid was nice enough to at least pump the water out and send me a video laughing about it... the woman is still sticking to her story that it was a triage in the battlefield situation and she had to choose between the two... 

So trust me people... I'm taking my lumps!



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So far, no response from any of the 13 most magnificiant women on the planet to mercedesbenz@126world.com email account



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Welp... I got all showered and dressed up tonight for my big night out Downtown Detroit at my most favorite restaurant "Fishbones"... they have an excellent Fillet Oscar steak dinner that I like to get.

Drove all the way Downtown Detroit, parked, fought thru the mobs and gangs only to be turned away at the door because they were closing early! 

To make things worse, by the time I got back home the only place open was Taco Bell!

So now here I sit, eating my Taco Bell trying to pretend it's a Fillet... It's good, but it's no Fishbones Fillet Oscar!

Oh well... It could always be worse. I could be six months pregnant! LOL j/k



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It's been an interesting few days over here at the SELLC ranch... been making progress while trying to tell myself this is not "as good as it gets."

I keep myself entertained thru the days not by watching TV (unless I'm in bed having sex, but I'm really not watching TV then either, just familar white noise) but rather I find entertainment in these women, and the brave members who hang out in this here forum.

Looking back at all of them, Melissa is now married, with a bun in the oven, and were talking a big bun... in the 96 percentile! If she has a natural birth it would be wise if Martin brought some crisp hundred dollar bills with him to the delivery room because when I asked for the "Husband stitch" the Dr. rubbed his finger and thumb together and held out his hand! LOL, not even a joke! I felt the Doctor owed it to me, since I seen him cut her from her pussy to her asshole with a scalpel getting the little crotch goblin out! Shocked I didn't pass out to be honest! And then the Doctors name was "Dr. Marlin"... I'm thinking to myself, hey! My wifes pussy is not a fish for you to gut, Dr. "Marlin"! lol, all things considered things turned out good for the kid and the wife! And you would never guess my wife's vagina squeezed out a whole kid now days! So all is not lost after child birth! It's still good stuff and Dr. Marlin did a super job!

But Melissa isn't the only one... Seems that even Gabrielle Williott has finally found herself someone who may be as crazy as she was! The dude reminds me of Christian Slater from back in the Pump up the Volume days! Very strong vibes every time I see them in social media together! Even Ali has gotten her groove back, and is now on the pill and dating! These are good signs folks! 'Ole Glee Club and Dana are going strong and looking good... even her armada, Amy Silverberg, has found herself a hunka-hunka burning love and they look very happy as well! Sarah is MIA, but I'm thinking she may be starting a family (this is just a guess). So it would seem all of our favorite internet stars are doing pretty good!

There is just two more left... Desi and Eden! They better get cracking or I'll have to sister wife them

 



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You know what they say... You can pick your friends but you can't pick your family! and who need enimies when we have such good internet friends? 

I forgot to mention in my previous post that even Gabby seems to be back in LA with her pimp boyfriend who drives the Jeep... or maybe it's her Jeep? LOL and even Carly Rogers is going on dates with complete strangers she meets at Bdubs to crash weddings! It's a very exciting time! Even Rachel and her B list moviestar boyfriend, Brenden, seem to be hitting it off pretty good! I can't deny the action and suspense is addictive... Usually after having to do something online I'll check up on a few of them, hoping they have posted something to break up all the BS politics on the MSM news desks I frequent. It's like Ohhhhh-Wow! Something new with so and so... like waiting for the lone ranger on the radio. I'm trying to share more and more, like they do several times a day... I do enjoy their posts and it's all in good internet fun. 

The only reason I post about it in here is because after BenzWorld and Twitter did me wrong, I decided I wasn't going to put myself out there to only have my entire existance removed from a platform because I called Elon Musk a retard, or had better advice on fixing cars than some Dentist who was driving around his parents Mercedes. 

I decided that I was not going to be ignored and cut off at the knees by any more platforms! But not in the crazy fatal attraction way... Rather the cool and grunge way

 

 



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And check out this salvo from the "A" list where they all come together

biged.jpg

 

That is the "Royal Flush" of Tweets right there folks... Hollywood must be great if a old guy like Big Ed can pick up a 29 y/o hottie like that on national TV! LOL

I'm sure they are mocking me... I don't think I look like Big Ed! I have a neck! But as many lumps as I have taken over the decades, it's a wonder I even have a neck left!

But it's nice to see them all in action on a single Tweet...

Touche ladies...

By the way, I'm boycotting the Emmys this year because they snubbed Yellowstone! By far one of the BEST new shows out IMHO.

Cut me some slack guys... My kids moving to Texas in less than a few weeks! It's not been easy for me. Sure, I might walk around like everything is okay, but deep down I just want one crazy 48 hour summer tryst in California! 

 



-- Edited by SELLC on Wednesday 13th of July 2022 06:42:24 PM

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I can't deny that when I was walking around downtown Detroit the other night, I thought about Desi when I passed this restaurant

threeleggedgoatdetroit1.jpg



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Looks like Rachel finally got that bikini wax she was talking about! Must be getting ready to go on vacation to the beach somewhere...

bikiniwax.jpg



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Wait a minute... no... naw... it couldn't be!

Eden in May 28th... 

drangervibes.jpg

And then, Eden in July 4th

fuaeden.jpg

I'm no expert in hair, but I know it don't grow that long in just two months! Where did she get it?

bikiniwax.jpg

From Rachel's Bikini Wax maybe? Tell me that color isn't identical!



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Well guys... as it turns out, Rachel was just getting a hair cut, not a bikini wax. Guess I should have stuck around a little longer for the selfie of the finished work.

rflookinggood.jpg

Whoever has been doing her hair is clearly doing a great job! And look at the fancy paint job on them nails! Rachel has always looked good in leopard print anything! And outside of her cat print fetish you would never guess that she has FOUR cats!

I'm honestly shocked it took me two weeks to notice Eden's hair extensions! I knew something was different about her in that July 4th photo, but I just couldn't put my finger on it until I seen Rachels hair clippings. Then it was like BAM! 

Ah well, I got a real big kick out of it last night... and it sure was more fun than reading the news all night and feeling like shit.

Since I had a little fun at their expense last night, I guess I'll let them in on a little secret I've been keeping this July...

Come the 23rd, my woman (Brandee) will be turning 50 years old! That's right folks! THE BIG FIVE O! 

I'm pretty sure that the day of her birthday, or however long it takes for us to have sex after her birthday, she will be the OLDEST woman I have ever been with! At least that I was sober enough to remember! 

When I met Brandee she was 28... I managed to get her pregnant right away and ended up marrying her six days after her 29th Birthday and I have always prided myself on being able to pick up and marry an older woman...

But now, since I'm in my mid 40's (LOL - read that as 46) and she is going to be in her 50's, I am starting to wonder about the wisdom of my thinking in my mid-twenties... Would I do it all over again? FUCKING RIGHT I WOULD... but maybe I should have met her a little sooner, like when she was 18... of course if we look at it that way I'd have been only 15 myself... basically amounts to a Senior in High School dating a Freshman... not a big age separation... no big deal.

Still it is with great delight that I remind her that she's turning 50 this year, while I'll still be in my mid 40's! She's still in denial because she keeps telling me she isn't turning 50 this year...

I tried to float the 48 hour tryst in California idea since her Birthday is on the 23rd, my Birthday is on the 28th and our 21 year anniversary is on the 29th! It just FEELS like I should do something really crazy fun and cool the entire week with her... but, she can't stand California... swears she will never again return! Given the current vibes around the new Xi varient in the greater Los Angeles area, it probably would not be much fun... Such a shame too!

You know, I'm not going to lie... I ain't 50 or nothing, but I don't know if I got what it takes to do a 24 hour drive in the Corvette anymore! At least not with the uncertanty of gas prices and new COVID variants... let's also not forget about Monkey Pox! doh

It's like I have become a hermit of sorts during this pandemic! Talking to and about people who probably don't even know I exist! It's really quite a pathetic existence, but I seem to enjoy myself every now and then... at least for a married guy in his mid-fourties who uses the entire WWW as his chat app... I know I have already spun this tune on page #1 but it seems so fitting for my social life outside of being married with children.

 



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Rastus wrote:

You know what ?...

I'm starting to think this "Melissa"-fascination is healthy for you SELLC...She's bringing the Bill Clinton out of your system !


 

What are your thoughts now Rastus?

Wilt Chamberlain? 



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When I was 25, I met an older woman who would forever change my life while working at the Hilton Hotel... Now over 20 years later we eat complementary breakfast in bed at the Hilton as Hilton Honor guests. This is not her or the Hilton

bedmirror.jpg



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How the thrist trap photos started

Melissa_Stetten1.jpg

 

How they are going

xoxo



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OMG... I think it's so sexy when Melissa talks cars! 

mscars.jpg

And while ALL of her cars would be nothing more than childs play for me, it was her earlier work that really sucked me in.

This is the Melissa Stetten that I fell in love with... As a mechanic I just couldn't help but to relate! LOL

And while I might have been teasing with the Aliens clip, I think what she is doing now is pretty effing cool... She is making babies! That's even cooler than cars!

I just wanted to mention this because sometimes these monolog post can be misinterpreted... I totally respect what she is going thru, and there is little in life that I respect more than brining another human into this world!

So I only make this post to remind her that I'm a fan, and she can do no wrong... so keep posting them baby bump videos! 



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I might also add that her first four loves were about four cylinders short of anything I'd be caught dead in... but for a girl they are pretty respectable rides! LOL

If she would have just started dating me back then, she would still own that GTI VW! LOL

I still think it's harder to have sex in a C4 Corvette than a Suzuki X90, but there is only one person that I know of that could confirm that...

And we should NEVER forget that if it weren't for Melissa there would be no WebCrawlers thread, or even any of the 11 other women in this thread... 

So there is that fact...



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Dude must have Big Dick Energy

Michigan woman sues man for standing her up on date, gets into argument with judge

https://www.foxnews.com/us/michigan-woman-sues-man-standing-date-gets-argument-judge



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Welp, it's the day before my woman's big 50th Birthday... I feel like I should do something really crazy for a few days, go somewhere... something.

She said she doesn't want to go anywhere, which in my silly mind means I must be laying down the pipe pretty good. But it still seems like we're letting fear stop us from going somewhere and having a good time.

I've been checking all kinds of last minute destinations but unlike other recent adventures, this time it's tricky! It's tricky because I actually have to take her wherever I book or reserve a room. Sometimes getting her in the car, and for sure trying to get her on an Airplane is a tricky feat! In any other situation I could use the whole, "Well I'll just go without you" but this time I'd be a pretty big piece of shit if I left her home for her birthday vacation! LOL

So it's tricky... and she is one of them women that will swear she doesn't want or like something, even when she does... For instance, on our last trip to Detroit I said to her: "Let's go out for dinner downtown" and she responded, "Oh no they are shooting people down there, I don't want to go!"... then after an hour or so of buttering her up with all that talk of sea-food she reluctantly agreed to go... but then, while walking the streets of Detroit holding my hand she decides to stop by some drunk passed out black guy, reach in her purse, pulls out a SINGLE DOLLAR BILL, wakes the guy up and hands it to him! The look on his face, as he took a double take... $1 fucking measly dollar! Clearly he was offended, and the thing was, he wasn't even a bum! Just some dude who had drank too much at the three legged goat and was passed out on the stairs! LOL... I really think she was trying to get me shot! When I got her out of that mess I asked her WTF she was doing, she said "I put dollar bills in my purse so I could give them to the bums when we were walking to the restaurant"... and I'm just like,

1st off - What the fuck is anyone going to buy with $1? You can't even buy a fucking bottled water for $1!

2nd - You never reach in your purse walking on a crowded street on the weekend in Detroit! Felt like I was playing defensive line for the Lions while I blocked all the people who would have no doubt run her less than 100 pound ass over blocking a crowded street while she "blessed" someone with a $1 bill.

3rd - The guy wasn't even a bum! Had on a nice thin leather jacket, belt, dress pants and what looked to be Yeezies! He was clearly passed out from intoxication! What was she thinking trying to wake up some passed out dude for $1 anyway? LOL, bum or not!

Luckily I know my way around the Greektown district and I was able to get us back to the car without crossing paths with that guy who probably no doubt was just startled out of his drunken stooper for $1... I mean, I actually seen the guy look closer at the bill because he couldn't belive someone would think $1 is some big thing... little did he know just a few years ago before the pandemic she used to just hand the bums change! But I'm telling you, this was no bum... it was just some dude who drank too much and passed out on the steps. I was going to give him a $100 bill, but I didn't want to steal her thunder... LOL, plus I just got her out of there before the guy could compose himself enough to even stand up. 

But it's shit like that... you know. But who knows, maybe her waking him up prevented him from getting mugged or worse. He was pretty out of it... I can imagine him telling the story the next day "Yo man, I was so fucked up at the three legged goat I passed out on the stairs and some white Karen woke me up to give me a $1 bill like I was some kind of bum wearing yeezies, and WTF a dollar gonna buy anyway? If I wasn't half asleep I would have kicked her cracker husbands ass, and took all his money like I was a hooker in Miami!" 

And there is also some other impedements to a nice vacation somewhere out of town, my Sister is in town with her kids... and our oldest still swears he's moving to Texas the 1st week of August! So whatever I do it's got to be fast and action packed! Or I'm looking at a massive dinner bill at a local resturant here in Plymouth to take everyone out to dinner... Party of 10, at least two or three times since both our birthdays and our anniversary fall within a week of each other...

Fuck... I wanna do something... ANYTHING! And you know what, for the first time in a long time I've got my ducks in a row and we could easily slip away for the weekend, even a week if need be... the whole entire two birthdays and an anniversary. I just can't think of anywhere I'd want to be stuck for an entire week though... 

Maybe I should just stick to what has worked for the past 21 years... stay at home and lay the pipe! 

 



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In an act of desperation I have been nibbling around... I guess this would be the two places I would go that would require air travel... and geez, has anyone had to price tickets latley? LOL

1st up would be LA, just so I could finally say I been to the Centurion Lounge before I head to the hotel and watch the woman hand out dollar bills to all the bums on the beaches.

laxvacay.jpg

The price isn't too bad for TWO non-stop flights at the last minute if you ask me! And that's ROUND TRIP! Probably LESS than I would spend alone in gasoline driving there, AND I'd save TWO FULL days at least in drive time, plus wear and tear on the Vette... This would be a VERY hard sell considering the woman HATES California... But if I had a band of dollar bills, maybe she would come around? But shit, a whole WEEK in California... I dunno, maybe we could just get back on the plane and head home after we eat at the Centurion lounge?

And then we have the next destination that I would consider...

miamivacay.jpg

No doubt I have not had the best luck on my past Miami trips... This might be an even harder sell! And look at the times and layovers! One of the flights is OVER 14 hours! It only takes 3 hours to fly from Detroit to Miami! Hell it only takes 4 hours to fly from Detroit to LAX! Are people really paying this kind of money for flights that almost take up an entire day to Miami?

I think it's safe to say I wouldn't fork over $800, let alone $2419 for a round trip to Miami with one layover and an 8-14 hour arrival time! WTF is that?

So Miami is out...

I was mulling Las Vegas, however I'm over the whole Casino thing... I think I've finally got that out of my system! Things like masks and not being able to smoke in the Casino make it not such a desirable place for someone like me or the woman to visit. Las Vegas has changed, you can't even get a good steak there anymore past 10pm!



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The furthest option I'd be willing to drive is Hilton Head Island in South Carolina... It's about 900 miles and would take about 14 hours of drive time @ 23 Miles per gallon would be about $250 each way in gas, but I'd have a car and I love driving around Hilton Head Island with the top down... It's like a whole other world down there on the island, really cool if you ask me.

hiltonheadvacay.jpg

But getting the woman to agree to 14 hours in the car would require bootlegging booze across dry counties because the wife claims she needs to drink to tolerate my driving. That means by the time we get there she'll be liquored up and pissed off.  

I won't deny that Hilton Head has some of the coolest beaches I have ever set foot on... but the people there don't seem to like smokers, nor is it a 420 friendly destination. 

I'll never forget the first time I went to Hilton Head Island... I got there and called up the Hilton looking for their hotel and wouldn't you know it... Not a SINGLE Hilton Hotel on the entire Island! LOL, my whole life I thought it was an island with a big Hilton Hotel on it! 

The only other place I would consider driving is Nashville Tennessee... It's only an eight hour drive from Detroit... but we were just there before the Pandemic so I'm not sure it's quite time...

Already did the Cedar Point thing... and there is no way I am going out of the country, if only because I havent had a valid passport since I went to England... but because there is NO WAY I'd go out of the country right now with all this pandemic craziness... in fact, I don't have any desire to renew my passport. I simpily do not want to travel outside of the United States, and I don't see that changing anytime soon, if ever. 

I guess I'm just a piece of shit... it's gonna be the womans 50th Birthday and I ain't got shit for plans... to be honest I don't even feel like going anywhere based on what I'm seeing in the news. 

Maybe I'll just stick around here and get some things done... I could probably buy a few appliances for what I'm going to spend to go anywhere and stay in a hotel, which no doubt will not be a whole lot of fun in the tail end of the pandemic. 

I think I'm just turning into a big pussy or something... or even worse yet, I'm getting old *gasp* !

I guess we're gonna do the same thing we do every night

 



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Dispite all my rage, I'm still just a RAT IN A CAGE!



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Well folks... I have yet to sell the woman on any trips.

I'm starting to think

womansjob.jpg

I'll respect her wishes to not do anything on her Birthday... But my Birthday is right after hers and I won't be a rat in a cage!



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Wait a minute, hold the press! My luck is starting to change!

steakandpotato.jpg

I have also decided, circumstances being what they are (COVID pandemic and such) that I am just not going to even have my Birthday this year, so I will remain 46 for another year.

It's only the right thing to do! Things being the way they are and all...

So instead of being a rat in a cage, I'll be old folk in a home

 



-- Edited by SELLC on Friday 22nd of July 2022 06:29:46 PM

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Just found out that Brandee has been hiding my Hooters shirt since the Smashing Pumpinks concert!

hooters2022.jpg

And guess what? I STILL wear it better than she does!

Happy 50th Birthday Brandee Lee!



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And what do we have here?

brandeelee50.jpg

Another rat in the cage!

 



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